Original Message (Pre-Screened)
Category: Race/Ethnicity
Subject: Black Men not monogamous?
Question: add to Watch List | reply
Why is it that most black men don't think they need to be monogamous with one woman?

Posted:9/18/2009
By:
Peach M, Edmonton, NA, Canada , Female , White/Caucasian , Straight , Middle class
Mesg ID: 7576e80c-0614-49f3-8158-6246f1727034
Responses:5
Share Y? Forum discussion on Facebook Share Y? Forum discussion on Twitter Share Y? Forum discussionShareThis
Pre-screened Responses

None

Unscreened Responses
Category: Race/Ethnicity
Subject: Well to be trruth being a Black man
Reply: read original | add to Watch List | reply | request removal
You would need to live the life of one. It really is hard to explain, but to sum it up. Take the girl who falls into some kind of school sport when she is younger. As the years progress she doesn't take it seriously,but it is something she just does. (This is a girl of any race by the way). Then all of a sudden boom Puberty hits. She then before she knows it is wearing size 36C, The ideal breast size that actually gets more appreciation from. (I'm saying this because usually the bigger the breasts the more a girl weighs.) In high school anyway. At any rate this girl is the first in her grade level to have such growth in breast and on top of that it shows more because she is in shape from the sport she played. This girl Now takes on the perhaps Persona of the black mail (of course that isn't the right description, but oh well). So by this I mean, to many of the boys in school she is known as the girl with the big breasts. She goes through her school days and then even daily life noticing that she is getting alot of attention. Alot good and some of it bad. Smiles from random guys and even men way older than her notice her. Then on the other side jealous girls who are either jealous of her breasts or jealous of the attention she gets, or etc. Of course this can bring out all types of emotions, however us being humans we usually go for the good experiences that make us feel good or smile. Of course not every experience that will happen that should be good will turn out good, but hey it's life.


So now to turn it around instead of big breasts, it is skin. And instead of hitting puberty, it is being conceived. So it is not so much the monogamy of a black man, it is the monogamy of an African American, who are usually not fully african to say because of slavery and interracial marriages. I am not pulling the racial card, but being a black man and meeting blacks from other countries, their loyalty to relationships is completely different. Talk to someone from Africa or somewhere else in the world, their lives and perspective are different. We grow differently from Child to adult, based on our upbringing. I myself grew up in the south in Texas. The high school I attended was one of the last one's to be segregated in the metro area i lived in. So to keep it even shorter. We live in this opressive life where we are the "!" so to speak. The majority of the population of the country that we come in CONTACT with and on T.V. are not black. This being Popular T.V. that is spoken highly of or openly discussed. We are only really known in the media for being Athlete, Singers, Ghetto or Funny. We don't have a place where there is no entertainment.

So this being said, this being something we experience through our lives and stimulated constantly by all types of stereotypes while living in our environment. When we get around multiple people who like us, we want to experience it all. Almost in the same instance why the girl who is known as a whore, becomes one. It is a psychological thing. If you are told for a long time that you are no good and that you can't make it, when you get it, you splurge. Plain and simple. The past of a person determines how they act.

So now think of black parents and their children, what economic class they are in while experiencing something similar to just the "black man". How do you think the parent feels as they see their child go. How many black men or women do you know where their parents have been together for years and their parents made a job that would be noticed as middle class wages.


Posted:3/8/2013
By:
David Giles, New York, NY, United States , 27 , Male , Spiritualistl, minimalist and pro humanity , Black/African American , Straight , Technical Analyst , Lower middle class
Mesg ID: 39fe9f70-6216-42d4-8610-f64756938ce1
Responses:0
Category: Race/Ethnicity
Subject: Dumb idiots.
Reply: read original | add to Watch List | reply | request removal
some black men just think "oh well i like the music so i'll go do what it says" True story.

Posted:10/10/2012
By:
Cletus Fairfield, Dallas, TX, United States , 35 , Male , Southern Baptist , White/Caucasian , Straight , Over 4 Years of College , Upper class
Mesg ID: 8b08ec46-0a50-412d-96f0-d20e499ba850
Responses:0
Category: Race/Ethnicity
Subject: Answer
Reply: read original | add to Watch List | reply | request removal
Read: The Curse of 1920 (downloadable free off google).

Posted:9/11/2012
By:
Mike J, Cedar Rapids, IA, United States , 20 , Male , Lutheran , White/Caucasian , Straight , Military , 2 Years of College , Middle class
Mesg ID: be71b016-909b-44e6-9903-954fae03c846
Responses:0
Category: Race/Ethnicity
Subject: Black Men not monogamous?
Reply: read original | add to Watch List | reply | request removal
I don't think it is an issue of black men being ignorant - not having the awareness of such moral values.

I don't think it is an issue of black men being arrogant - not having the humility to accept such moral values.

There are men of every ethnicity, race, and religion who are averse to monogamous relationships and there are men of every country, creed, and culture who are unfaithful and exhibit selfish behavior.

I think the reason it is presumed that most black men think this way and that most black men behave this way is by and large because of stereotypes.

Most black men are more than willing and able to embrace and accept commitment, and most black men do not think it is absurd to be monogamous with one woman.

However, I will say that aside from simply attributing this generalization to the "black brute" stereotype that goes back to days of slavery that is in some ways still associated with black men, there may be some plausibility to this presumption from a socioeconomic standpoint.

Environment plays a much greater role in the attitude and behavior of people than race. A black man who grows up in a wealthy, priviledged community in Maine is not going to think or act the same as a black man who grows up in an impoverished, urban neighborhood.

With that in mind, consider that the median income of blacks in the U.S. is significantly lower than that of whites and this propensity for poverty is paramount, because studies show that poverty not only has significant affects on communities but it has significant affects on culture also.

If there is any truth to the presumption that black men don't think they need to be monogamous with one woman, I would say it is due to income disparity as opposed to simply being a matter of race.

Posted:5/5/2012
By:
Blue Moses, Washington , DC, United States , Male , Agnostic , Black/African American , Straight , Middle class, Blind
Mesg ID: 75fbc123-66c1-41b9-b66f-aa531e5bb5b4
Responses:0
Category: Race/Ethnicity
Subject: Black Men not monogamous?
Reply: read original | add to Watch List | reply | request removal
You made an erroneous judgement and applied it to a whole group of people. That's called prejudice, and it's wrong.

Most Black men are no more or no less monogamous than any other race. I am a Black man and am faithful. I could show you dozens of Black men I know who are very monogamous.

A study was released a few weeks ago suggesting exactly what you assumed. The report was very racially offensive.
Posted:8/11/2010
By:
G. Thomas, Phoenix, AZ, United States , 47 , Male , non religious , Black/African American , Straight , 2 Years of College , Middle class, cannot seem to clear the box
Mesg ID: 21cde715-f822-41d4-a0a8-23f48323207a
Responses:0
FAQ | Categories | Search | Post